And It All Started With a Big Bang

The Big Bang Theory is one of the few shows that you like watching over and over again simply because you cannot get enough of it. The fun, the laughter, the nonsensical blabbering of the four main characters (Sheldon, Leonard, Howard and Raj) and the realistic, street smart presence of Penny- are just a few things that get you hooked to the show. Even though the show is science related and revolves around the ‘physicality’ of things, it is not the usual boring scientific stuff we see on telly and change the channel. It brings in the element of comedy and renders it impossible for people to not like the show and the adorable Sheldon Cooper and Penny. It is the kind of show where I’d like to sit in front of the television with a bowl of pop corns in hand and leave all my worries outside the room. Sheldon and Penny are my two favourite characters on the show and it is an absolute treat to watch them.

Sheldon mostly baffles you with his brilliance and pomp but there are also moments when he shows some signs of being a normal human being rather than a robot with skin on it. His friends are his world, which is something since he hardly knows people other than Leonard, Raj and Penny who are his friends and Howard whom he considers to be an acquaintance. Jim Parson, who plays the character of Sheldon, is simply outstanding when it comes to delivery of dialogues and expressions. When the name ‘Sheldon’ is mentioned, his image springs up in my mind with him doing Spock’s hand gesture for peace and harmony. The very fact that he uses extremely complex terms for explaining something as simple as food makes him annoyingly hilarious and cute. In an episode where their house was broken into, he wrote a journal entry which sounded like a movie script! Though he can be an arrogant pig when it comes to the aptness of his knowledge in front of his fellow scientists, he can be equally sweet and caring when they are in trouble. One episode where Penny falls in the bath tub and dislocates her shoulder, he did as much as driving her to the hospital and sang “soft kitty” to put her to sleep! He is one character who can make you forget your woes when he’s with you, taking you to his apartment 4A in Pasadena, California and bombarding you with himself. He can dazzle you with his brilliance and baffle you with his bullshit at the same time.

Penny is another character whom I really like, more so because she is realistic in almost every way and gives the image of any regular girl walking down the street, unlike the other four nerds who seem to have come from an alien planet altogether. Though at first she might come across as a dumb blonde girl who cares only about her clothes and shoes, which is more because she is surrounded by four other extra smart and nerdy geeks, she is a street smart woman who can beat even the brightest minds with her simple words. She can really take you for a ride when she is up to it and even has the ability to shut Sheldon up which is an achievement in itself. One thing she does well is showing her feminine side which sometimes borders on motherly instincts. Whenever one of her friends is in trouble or is troubled by something, she always takes it upon herself to make things right for him/her, even introducing the concept of slumber parties to the likes of Amy Farrah Fowler who is Sheldon’s equally geeky and nerdy ‘girl-who-is-a-friend’.

The other three characters are equally funny and interesting but Sheldon and Penny take the cake. It is even believed that the show is a big success mainly because of these two. Leonard is a smart and intelligent and provides sense to the show by being the most normal character. Howard is an engineer, is perpetually horny and is always dressed in 80’s style clothes which could be because he lives with his mother who controls him like a two year old. Raj is an Indian and though he belongs to a very wealthy Indian family, he constantly shows himself and his country as poor. This is perhaps the only thing in the show that I do not like. These five friends spend their time together and have a schedule of what they do every night. Oh and yes, they have an undying passion for comics and know the history of each hero by heart.

This show can make you laugh when you are down in the dumps and going through the most pathetic days. It takes you away from all your worries and for those twenty minutes you think of nothing but Sheldon, Leonard, Howard, Raj and Penny. This could also be because they speak abnormally fast and talk about scientific stuff you don’t generally think about and so you have to be extra vigilant. Last week when nothing seemed to be going right for me and there was no reason to even crack a smile, I saw an episode of The Big bang Theory. Since that day I watch at least two episodes every night just to wake up with a good feeling the next day. As Sheldon says, “BAZINGA!”

Exam-o-phobia

It's indeed that time of the year, when everything seems to be way more interesting than what should be interesting then. No matter how much you love the subject you've taken up or how much you motivate yourself, you'll surely groan whenever the word 'exams' comes to your mind. I personally do a lot of groaning when it comes to this. I've not been blessed with an ultra receptive mind nor with the capability of acing every exam. Yet I do not feel motivated enough to study. I talk to my friend about it; tell her how I'm not able to fully realize how deep I'm buried in shit and plead for some sort of motivation. The poor girl does all she can to uplift my spirits: sends motivational texts, scolds me, tells me how pathetic it would be if all others pass and I fail, what my parents will think of me, how I'll be able to face myself (really?) so on and so forth. But alas, nothing works. I'm back to square one after an entirety of fifteen minutes. What could possibly be the reason behind this mental malfunctioning?

As I put up this question, I realize that it is not tough to come up with an answer since I already have at least 3 on top of my mind. How fascinating! Is this what really happens with everybody or is it just me? That even after knowing the cause of a problem we continue living with it rather than trying to cure it? That we are so hopelessly shameless that nothing matters anymore? Well for the benefit and enlightenment of the reader, I shall put forth some reasons that are floating lazily on the surface of my brain.

When I sit down to study I am suddenly flooded with thoughts and memories of episodes that took place long back (and I mean almost a year), recent events that have even the slightest impact on me or no impact at all even, some songs which I never used to hear before but now they continuously keep buzzing in my head and not to mention the thought of that certain someone (yes, one major hazard of being a girl I guess) continuously plaguing my mind. And once I start thinking, I am lost for a good hour or two. Sometimes I replay the entire conversation in my head, sometimes only the memorable parts. Oh, and many a times it so happens that I start thinking of a certain t.v show and end up playing an entire episode in my head. Now this has to qualify me as a retard. Many times my sister walks into the room to find me staring stupidly at the opposite wall with a slight smile on my face. The look on her face then surely says that I am a retard. Also, when I think of that certain person, I tend to think in detail; i take in every single smile, every smirk, every word uttered etc etc. So naturally it takes up time. And when it comes to matters such as these, all reason vanishes and only stupid feelings and emotions are left to float in.

The thing to notice here is that there is too much thinking going on. The mind is continuously churning some thought or the other, not necessarily pleasant ones. This has to have something to do with my doing Literature, a course that forces us to think and think in every way possible. Sometimes even over think things. This mind won't let me rest, or rather study. In hours not a single word of the text is comprehended as much as random thoughts are. Oh you troublesome, troublesome mind!

It is no joke when I say that I feel extra sleepy before and during exams. And I'm not alone in this, the same motivational friend feels so too. My theory is that since we study more before and during exams our brain works more and obviously gets tired. Now it also requires time to rest and recharge itself, does it not? It is another matter entirely that I don't study so much in the first place that my brain should get tired. The only explainable reason then seems to be that the brain gets tired even when we think random stuff. So naturally for it to work properly later on we need to give it some rest. Also, everything seems so much more delightful: those kids shrieking and playing in the park, that continuous music provided by cars and bikes passing by, the person at the door etc etc. Even cooking and cleaning utensils seems to be a pleasant task then. Oh, but I would never move my lazy self from my bed to do all this. Exams are the perfect time to play Bluff with your parents. Since I need to utilize my time studying, I can obviously not go and do all the domestic work, can I? Besides, exams give a reason to log in to Facebook every five minutes. As I have to constantly look up information regarding my texts, I easily while away time on Facebook checking out new pictures that have been put up, status updates, playing silly games and posting on the profile walls.

The fact that I am sitting here writing this random blog entry instead of studying for exams alone talks of my exam-o-phobia.

The Difficulty of Being Human

Sometimes you reach your saturation point after which taking anything becomes unbearable and impossible. Sometimes you have to give back what you get, whether good or bad, it makes no difference. Sometimes something so sinister happens that you are forced to change your view of the world. Sometimes the person you trust the most is the one who disappoints you the most. And sometimes the one person who always seems to be a disappointment, makes the world seem right again with only a smile, a gesture.
Sometimes it is hard to find a reason for living and going on with your mundane routine . Sometimes you want to give it all up and let yourself fall away into nothingness where no feeling, no emotion, no happiness, no hurt can touch you.
But then again, are you even living? This is the world of the living. And it comes with the package.
Always.

The Unintended Crime

There was a loud crash from the kitchen which resonated throughout the house. The crash ensued a silence so tangible that you could cut with a knife. A minute later a woman could be heard sobbing from inside the kitchen.

Vipin went in quickly, followed by his daughters and saw his wife sitting on a stool with her head in her hands and shaking uncontrollably. On the floor the milk was flowing in an abstract shape, making its way under the refrigerator on one side and into the small drain under the sink on the other. Vipin kept staring at his wife for a few seconds after which he let out a sigh and went over to her side, careful to avoid spoiling his new shoes. He put a hand on her shoulder and soothingly said in a hoarse voice, “Come now Parul, it is just milk. No need to take so much tension and worry yourself sick. It’s ok, come now.”  Parul looked up at her husband, her face streaked with tears and eyes red. She shook her head, mumbled an inaudible apology and hurried out of the room, patting her elder daughter Nupur on her way out. Vipin looked at his beloved daughters, gazing at them intently.

How could he prevent another disaster from happening? How could he stop his own mind from being flooded with doubts and uncertainty?  Hadn’t last time been quite similar? Hadn’t all their preparations gone down the drain just like the milk on the floor? Could he possibly stop four sets of expectations from breaking?

He put a smile on his face and ushered them out of the kitchen, asking the maid to clean the mess. He sent both his daughters in their room to get ready as it was almost time for the prospective groom’s family to arrive. He looked around the living room once again, making sure there was nothing out of its place. He went into his room where he found Parul sitting in front of the mirror combing her hair yet again. “Parul, we need to control ourselves now. We can’t just let our apprehensions break Nupur’s morale. We do not want it to turn out to be a disaster like last time, do we?” Parul nodded and took in a deep breath and let it out noisily, putting on a smile and going over to her daughters in the next room. “Nupur are you ready now? Let me see how my princess is looking today. Ahh, beautiful! Megha, fetch my kajal from my room.”

The door bell rang shrilly and made everybody jump. For a fraction of a second there was no sound nor any movement. Then Vipin cleared his throat and walked rigidly to the door. He waited for his wife to come and stand behind him and then finally opened the door.

“Welcome, welcome! Please come in Aggarwal ji, please come in. Namaste bhabhi ji, please come in.”

“How are you Jain sahab, hope everything is well and good” replied the groom’s father. He sat on the largest sofa with his wife on one side and his son on the other. His eyes moved around the living room, taking in every inch of the place. Things seemed to have met his approval as he grinned at Vipin and enquired about his ailing father. There was a concentrated silence, in between which the women of both the families smiled at each other and the men cleared their throats. Vipin took this opportunity to take in his prospective son-in-law. Medium height, lean body and average looks- his own daughter was definitely more handsome. The boy was pursuing his MBA in marketing and had left his job to “study properly” for his upcoming exams. He could not help thinking that Nupur was already working with a well established consultancy firm. The boy’s father had maintained that they wanted a quick wedding.

Parul was making small conversations with the boy’s mother enquiring about their family, whether they lived jointly or separately. The conversation dissolved into silence again and so Vipin asked his wife to bring some snacks and tea. After a short interval when Parul returned with their maid carrying a tray laden with snacks and a pot of hot steaming tea, Vipin asked her to bring Nupur out as well.

“Please wait a second, Jain sahab, what’s the hurry? Let’s talk first” contravened the boy’s father.

“Ok, as you wish Aggarwal ji, no issues” pat came the reply from the girl’s father.

“Jain sahab, we come from a well to do and prestigious family. We have relatives spread across half of India and some even live abroad. Everybody would come for the wedding as he is our only son, much loved by everybody in the family.”

Vipin nodded his head to everything he said, his mind already racing way ahead. He knew what was coming, knew what expectations they had. He also knew what the conclusion of this would be. He kept quiet and listened to them. Parul on the other hand was wringing her hands and fidgeting every two seconds. She had a haggard look on her face that screamed for mercy.

The boy’s father went on with his speech about his family holdings, their rich relatives, and the number of cars in their family, his son’s prospective earnings and their family name. All this while Vipin maintained a calm and indifferent front and let Aggarwal go on with his ramblings. He knew the end result of this conversation and expected nothing else now. He knew, despite his repeated enquiries and his wife’s repeated prayers that this was going to be like the last meeting. There was no hope. By now Vipin had learnt to not let his hopes soar high.

“So Jain sahab, what do you have to say?”

Vipin folded his hands, looked straight in the eyes of the man in front of him and said “I am a small man Aggarwal ji...” 

A Note

So here's a note dedicated to you.
I've known you for over a year now and during this time I learnt a lot, about you and about people in general. We always remained friends no matter what. Blames and fights, happiness and smiles, we have shared practically everything in this one year. But recently things were not as good as we would have liked them to be. Listening to our story being repeated between two other people and understanding it in totality for the first time, I realize I was not as right as I had thought. I have been the one making the decisions and you accepted them. I goofed up many times. But now my mind is clear. Now when everything is over and things have changed forever, I am neither bitter nor happy. I simply want to take this opportunity to apologize for all that I did and wherever I have been wrong.
I am sorry.
A great person you are and a great friend you have been. I am perfectly at peace now, after telling you what I just realized. To you, a well deserved thanks! :)

The Choice Is Yours

A thirst for books, an undying love for various characters and a desire to be buried under books always- this is what drives many students to take up English Literature after school. I am one of them. But before I reached my decision and was firm that I would do Literature, I was confused and in doubt. Not because I doubted my love for the subject or thought I would not do well, but because I knew how the world would react and how they would look at me. These are my true thoughts and feelings. The reaction I got from people when I told them I was sitting for the entrance exam was a trailer of what I’d be getting later on. When people would ask me what I planned to do, I’d tell them I am preparing for Bachelor of Business Studies and they would exclaim loudly and say “that is a very good course”. But then I would add that I’m also preparing for the English entrance exam, they would say “oh, you want to be a teacher?” in a dry voice, with a smirk. Or if not that then they would say in a dismissive voice “what can you do further after English.” They feared I’d have no choices in/for the future except thankless minimalistic jobs.

A point came when I thought I’d do B.Com and be done with it, life ahead would be all set and I wouldn’t have to worry about anything. Then the cut offs came and when my parents asked me if I was sure about B.Com, I said no and told them I wanted to do Literature. And they didn’t argue with me, they didn’t question my decision. They knew where my interests lay and what would make me happy. And I took admission in the course I wanted.  They supported me. Thankfully.

Now I am not worried about those people and their thinking. I am not concerned with what they say about my future because now I know those people don’t know anything. Anyone who is half educated would know that in today’s world there is no longer that question of what one will you do in the future. Anybody and everybody can survive out there. If people are unaware of what the world has evolved into nowadays, then they have no right to poke their elongated noses in these affairs. An educated person who has done a course in literature can easily earn more than those who start at the basic level in some management related job. There are various avenues open for literature students- MBA , advertising, public relations, language related jobs, journalism (print and electronic), editing, university teacher, school teacher, translation and interpretation after learning another language, web designing and creative writing- to name a few. 

Now I really have to say- I’m spoilt for choices.

;-) :D

P.S: To be honest I don't understand why one job is looked down upon and the other one highly revered. Every job is a form of work and work requires energy and power (both mental and physical). So why is it such a bad thing if one earns less than the other? I agree money is a VERY important factor but is not the ONLY factor. If you are happy doing doing what you like and enjoy it, you have more than just those revered green notes. You are content and happy and enjoy life while working. The choice is obviously yours.

Bubbly

So many bubbles erupting inside me and so many butterflies taking rounds in the pit of my stomach. I feel happy, elated and excited after ages. Since coming back from Majkhali (where I had gone for a vacation) I had not been myself for various reasons. All those reasons are just too monotonous to even mention now. Some thing was just wrong and it felt wrong and it felt as if there was a barrier that was not letting the happiness pass. Though i had discussed my career options with my parents in Majkhali as I had planned, I was not entirely happy with the outcome. But now I know what I would like to do. Now I am more confident. A smile can be seen lurking on my face and a certain level of excitement and hope is perceptible to anyone who sees me or reads my texts or talks to me on phone or whatever. I am happy. That's it. Happy.
Funny what a conversation on the phone with your best friend, a few words showing confidence and exactly what you want to hear and a novel can do to you. Yes, these are the factors which helped bring back this smile and happiness. To these two wonderful people (S & P), I thank you both from the bottom of my heart. :D

So Much For My Happy Ending

So many plans and so many ideas. I had thought so much about how i would be meeting all my friends once I am back from Majkhali where I was going for a family vacation.

But it so happened that the very next day I cut my arm and the next day developed an allergy just around the wound. And to add to this pathetic state of affairs, I had to get an injection. Now that allergy has developed so much that the doctors are confused what it really is. :/

Now thanks to all this I can not go out anywhere, all my plans have now gone down the drain and I am on house arrest. But even if I had the choice of going out I wouldn't because it would be more than pathetic to have dirty, disgusted and torturous looks thrown at me for subjecting people to my 'allergy'. So I'm now a lonely girl who has only books, computer, phone and television for company. :/ :/

Another thing pissing off my already pissed off mind is how people are so self involved and uncaring to understand one's pain and agony. I have a real problem here and some think I'm just over hyping things. Well, they sure haven't gone through what I am going through. I feel like scratching my arm like crazy and tearing off the skin. The irritation and pain and the deadly itch is beyond my control. And on top of that 4 medicines make me cranky. But even after 1000 texts from me explaining what is the problem and how it is screwing up my mind, they like to believe it is my mood swings. So let it be that, I honestly don't give a damn now. I have better things to worry about. :/ :/ :/ 

Now to add to all this, I have just been informed that this allergy of mine is most probably not an allergy. It is some disease I've caught from somewhere. And for that I need to go to another doctor and might just have to get a few more injections. :/ :/ :/ :/

Sometimes, the one person we thought we'd like to keep around us for the rest of our lives ends up being the last person we want to talk to. There are some really good times when you promise each other never to fight and never to have an argument. But when the bad times come, you don't know what hits you and you stand there fighting, all those promises forgotten. But it's not one sided, both are equally involved in it. But you should always knows what to say and when and how to control that blabbering mouth. Because that is when the damage is done. Words said in anger are most of the time true, no matter how much you deny it later. And when i reach my saturation point where the brain says "no more!", that is when you realize you are wrong.. But now it is too late. Over a year has been lost in this ridiculousness and now it is time to move on. Now when I have decided to take a stand and I am strong, you can't come can tell me not to do it. There are things which you do not understand and don't even try to understand. Your behaviour is not my responsibility. Giving me the excuse that it's your nature doesn't work. If that is your nature, then being happy and carefree is mine. And these exactly what you are not letting me be. One second you decide to fight because it suits your mood and the other second you come back talking as if nothing happened. That is not how it works. Giving vent to your feeling just to take out your anger isn't how you are supposed to behave with people you call friends. After a point, it gets too much to handle. Everything does not revolve around you and my world specially does not. So it is not going to be according to you anymore. We won't talk just because you want to. We won't fight just because you want to get rid of your anger. We won't forget everything instantly just because you have nobody else.
Not anymore. Not now. I'm done. Just because you are bored in your vacation and don't have anything or anyone else, it does not mean you pretend everything is goody-goody between us. Because it is not and it won't be again.

Exam Period

5 exams in almost 25 days. One does get tired during such a hectic schedule. Had just so much to do the whole time, was busy like a bee. The gap between two exams  was for 15 days and I used them so efficiently. I had a movie marathon where I watched 10 movies in 2 days and wrote almost 4 blog entries. Then I watched Vampire Diaries on net all day long throughout the 'holidays' and got hooked onto it. I also wrote extensively in my journal and made broad plans about my upcoming trip just after the exams. I planned all that I have to take and what all I would do there. Then I watched a lot of television too to catch up on some of my favourite t.v shows and also watched some more movies. Oh yes, every night I watched two movies along with my sister, while eating butter popcorns and drinking Pepsi. Then I also used to roam around the house a lot and that helped me in my knowledge of the place, like i got to know exactly what is there in the house to eat and in what quantity so much so that my mother used to ask me about it. Now this is something, isn't it?
Then I also spent my time in lying on bed and staring at the ceiling. This provides great satisfaction and you can introspect as much as you want. It's another thing that I used to check my phone for some texts every five seconds, which obviously weren't there as my friends were so idle that they used to even forget texting. Then I also discovered what a bliss it is to spend an extra half an hour standing under the shower in the evenings, letting cold water run down your back, so relaxing. And I can possibly not forget to mention that I ate a lot during this period. As I was supposed to diet and workout during this period, I realized that all the work that I'm doing requires efforts and energy so I should eat properly and then hit the gym when exams get over.
I did study on the last day of the holidays and one day before the exam but then at 1am I realized it is more important to watch a movie than study for the exam at 9am. So then too I was true to my inner self and did what was required of me.
Now time had literally flown and I didn't realize one bit how I passed my time, it was all so hectic! But whatever it was, I think I worked hard and deserve some credit.

P.S: I have my last exam tomorrow and I though it absolutely necessary to update my blog this very moment. I know, I am very dedicated. :D 

London...

Vampire days

These days I don't do anything except sit in front of the computer and watch Vampire Diaries. Yes, you read it right. At the risk of sounding 'kiddish' I confess that I like it and the show is kind of nice. Come on, you'll also like it if the 'bad' vampire is so hot. It just adds to the whole concept of the creatures of the dark. My fascination for vampires goes way back to 11th grade when i started reading the Twilight series. Yes, the books are weird and all these books and shows focus on "18 Till I Die" more than how gruesome the vampires are. But even then I've fallen in love with the concept of VAMPIRES. It's fascinating to me. How they move around at the speed of lightening, drink blood, save the damsels, are good looking and not to mention rich. Vampires have a certain manliness about them which appeals to me. They are charming yet dangerous. That feel of mystery and danger and curiosity and charm.
I have a knack for people who have vampire-ish traits in them. A close friend of mine looks like a vampire from every angle and has very sharp canines. A classmate of mine has sharper canines and believe it or not, when he smiles his teeth actually show and give him a vampire-ish look. Can you blame a simple mortal for getting trapped in the charm of these pseudo vampires?
I started watching Vampire Diaries at the polite request of my best friend who is a big fan herself (no we are not high school teenagers. We are second year university students.) She used to tell me at least thrice every time we talked that if I don't watch VD (as she likes to call it lovingly) then I'm not a vampire lover. This used to irritate me because though I don't show it, my love for vampires runs deep in my veins. But then I'm only a poor lethargic creature and I don't believe in moving off the bed just like that. Now you tell me, who would make the enormous effort of getting off the bed, go over to the computer, switch it on and then have the patience to watch a show on net which plays for 5 minutes and buffers for 15 minutes? But my friend knows me well. She knows which chord to strike when. One day while talking on phone she said "A, if you consider me your friend you have to do something for me. For me, for my sake. If you love me." Now who would not melt at these words?
So I ended up watching VD late that very night. And as she had predicted, I was hooked from first episode itself. It actually showed vampires drinking human blood. The show is unpredictable, you don't know what will happen next, when a vampire with his fangs out will fly at you from which direction. There are people who get bitten by these vampires and change into one themselves. Yeah the story is the same- vampire was in love with a girl who died leaving him pining for centuries. And after the rebirth of this girl, they meet again (always in high school) and fall in love. The girl finds out that the love of her life is a vampire but love conquers all and they unite for eternity (the girl becomes a vampire too usually). But the presentation of the dark in all the scenes just adds to the whole concept and makes it worth watching.

Despite having three exams to prepare for and having various books to study from, I end up watching Vampire Diaries because of my love for vampires and the thrill of it all.
Basically, I have no life at the moment and I live off these shows. I am utterly jobless and no wonder I'm piling on weight.

First Year- fourth phase

January-
The Lady comes back:  Bhagya came back to college with two handbags hanging from both sides. But the thing to be noticed was how she looked. The paleness was still there and a tinge of yellow on the face too. She had lost a hell lot of weight and looked weak. Her legs were paining and she had to limp. Even then, the bandit queen that she is, she refused to sit around in class and walked up and down the stairs to attend classes. Thanks to her stubbornness and I'd say stupidity, she was bed ridden for the rest of the time till exams.
Internals: We had our internal exams that month and everybody was in a frenzy to get notes copied and what not. We were also included in all this, though. Surabhi and I used to coordinate our studies over the phone and would stay up till 3am studying and talking on the phone. How we gave those exams, only we know. It is a subject not to be approached by anybody.


February- 
The cold:  This was when we all the tension started. Nobody knew the reason, nobody knew the cause. But everybody knew something was wrong. This was when everybody stared drifting apart. Some people who were close became distant and those who were distant became close. People were busy with their own lives, engrossed in something or the other. Nobody had the time to spare for friends. Some had work and were busy. But even they had time, they were not interested in keeping up with others. Some had their insecurities and inhibitions due to which they were keeping a distance from everybody else.
The little Pixie and me: This was the time when Shruti grew close to me. We used to talk about everything and anything in general. We used to discuss our problems, isuues and even studities with each other. I remember once talking to her from 1am till 4am, discussing something. That day we became closer than we had ever been. That was the moment when we trusted each other most. The next day too we talked throughout the afternoon and texting was like an obsession. It still is for me.

March and April-
Things remained as they were. No improvement between the five of us. Fantastic Five was just a formality then. Those who were close remained that way and those were now distant, went further back. Everybody knew about it, but nobody spoke about it. Those who did end up speaking their mind were thought to be over sensitive and "thinking too much about non-existent things".  Some liked to say everything is perfect when they were themselves in the midst of it all. Things remained this way. We had our annual department fest Bacchanalia during which things did not get better at all. In fact there was no scope to do anything or solve anything. Everybody was hanging out with different people every minute, trying to avoid each other.

May-
Things between the five of us went from bad to worse. For me the most painful thing was to see my best friend in college go away. Who even after being done with the job 'didn't feel' talking to us. And after putting in as much effort as I could, I gave up. I stopped sending messages and stopped even trying to talk on my own. Then one epic day we all decided to have a little chat about this and various problems, explanations and feelings came out. Everybody spoke about stuff bothering them and out came some outrageous things such as people being jealous of others for becoming closer. Anyway, to cut a sad story short, we cleared up all the misunderstandings.
since then on things have been undeniably better between all of us. Everybody is now putting in the effort and now hopefully things will get better, like old times very soon.

First Year- third phase

October-
Commonwealth break:  The time for late night conferences. Surabhi, Bhagya (for now she's this and not Bhagyashree) and I used to talk on phone for a minimum of 2 hours. The maximum we had during that period was from 12am till 6am, when we had to put down the phone because our parents were beginning to get up. Those were the days when the three of us actually came close. We used to talk about anything and everything. One night we ended up analyzing each other- each person had to say what they feel about the other two. 3rd october was Bhagya's birthday and is clashed with the opening of the commonwealth games therefore, her birthday treat was cancelled. And she got to save on all the expenditure!
Opening of college:  After 15 days of separation the five of us met again and that was the time when our auto rides began. In the mornings we used to take one auto instead of 2 rickshaws and either Surabhi or Shruti used to end up sitting on me everyday. But those rides were fun and some days we would even be accompanied by some people from our class, mostly Dev on whom Munish used to sit. What fun.

November-
Dayout in CP: Bhagya, Surabhi and I went to Hanuman Mandir that day. It is Bhagya's weekly routine to go there and that day we decided to accompany her. Bhagya had to go for her uncle's wedding to Assam and so we bought some bangles for her her too from the shops at the back of the mandir. I still remember Bhagya's "line" while bargaining with the shop keeper. "Bhaiya, yeh rakho. Tyohaar ke din hai, Shagun samajh ke rakh lo." And i remember how i shot from my seat and ran in the opposite direction to control my laugh. After visiting the temple we went to McDonald's and had lunch there. Then we went to Janpath and bought a pair of footwear each. It was in the metro while going back home that we gave each other the names Sattu (Surabhi), Bhattu (Bhagya) and Attu (Aakriti).
That day, 2nd November, was the last day Bhagya came to college that year.
She fell ill the very next day and took a week off to rest before going to Assam. After coming back from there she was directly admitted in a nursing home and was diagnosed with Jaundice, Malaria and Dengue.

December-
Back to four: After that day, 2nd of November, it was us four again in college- Shruti, Munish, Surabhi and me. One day we went to visit Bhagya in the nursing home. We had lunch from a roadside shop while waiting for her to get up. And when we went to see her, we were shocked. I can only speak for myself, I was scared to see her. The Bhagya we knew, the strong, confident, bring-it-on sort of girl was lying on a hospital bed with tubes running down her arms and face pale. Her lips were white and dry and her body weak. I couldn't of course show this there, but I was worried, really worried.

After this days went by quickly without much of interesting stuff. D School (Delhi School of Economics) used to be our hangout place where we used to sit for hours together and eat and talk and laugh. Days went by in the preparation for the upcoming internal exams.

First Year- second phase

August-
Munish's birthday: 18th August was the day Munish turned 18. To make this day a bit more special for him we decided to give him a few surprises. In the morning nobody came with him in the metro. I was carrying a huge card with me in which we had written a few birthday quotes and general wishes. In class EVERYBODY wrote something or the other for him while we kept Munish away on some pretext or the other. And when the card was filled with birthday wishes, we gave it to him. He was surprised. Surprised that we remembered and bothered to do something for him. Then he gave us a treat in McDonald's and Surabhi and I mysteriously disappeared. We were walking the streets of Kamala Nagar in search of a birthday cake. And when we got it from CCD, we were walking the streets in search of a knife (which no shop had :/). Finally the cake was cut with the back of a spoon and eaten up by the hungry onlookers (read us) in a downright savage way.
"Thank you so much guys!" he said to everybody.

The lady walks in:  Classes ended and the four of us- Munish, Shruti, Surabhi and me, packed our bags to go to Kamala Nagar as usual. I went to the photocopy shop with Shruti and Surabhi while Munish stayed back. None of us noticed the new girl. When we come back from the shope after spending a fortune on copying notes, we saw Munish talking to the strange new girl. I went upto him and pulling his arm, very tactlessly said "Munish chal, we dont have the time! We're getting late." And he turned to give such a patronizing look, I tell you. Then he introduced me to the new girl and said "This is Bhagyashree."

You must know, I have a foot-in-mouth disease which seems to have no cure.

After hearing this I exclaimed loudly "oh this is bhagyashree? Right!" Yes it was embarrassing just two seconds later! Anyway, that exclamation was made because we all ha dheard her name being called out everyday and used to wonder who would this be. I myself had imagined her to be a simple girl in salwaar kameez who would be rather geeky. But she was a complete opposite of that image. She was tall, towering over me, and almost Munish's height. She wore a purple striped shirt with shorts. She had her sunglasses on her head and was talking in a very confident, say-one-wrong-word-and-i'll-break-your-face sort of way. I just said hi and then had a general talk with her for sometime. But after that we dropped the plan to go to Kamala so we stayed and talked to her some more.

Shruti's treat: Shruti had completed two years with her boyfriend so she was giving us all a treat at McDonald's. One happy girl she was that day and i can still see her jumping up and down with excitement. She was so happy that she did not even mind a few extra people. That was th first time she had openly shown us her excitement and happiness. That day i decided to nickname her Pixie.
That was also the first time Bhagyashree went out with us. We sat there for good two hours, eating and talking and laughing loudly! That was also the day when the five of us had gone back to college in an auto for the first time as it was raining like crazy. I remember us screaming with laughter, imagining what would be AS's reaction if we entered in an auto in her class, parking it right outside our classroom door. That was also the day when we went to Kamala again with a large group of people from our class.

First Year- first phase

July-

The first day:  I entered the classroom, nervous to the core and I saw boys sitting on one side and girls on the other. All expectations came tumbling down and I go and sit on the side of the girls, disappointed. After 14 years in a girls' school, I had expected to make some 'guy friends' in college. That was one of the main reasons why I had left an equally good girls'college and had come here.

By the end of our introductory lectures, where we actually had the introduction of each and every student, we were free to go where ever we wanted. By that time I had made friends with Surabhi, Shruti and Monica. We started chatting, talking about our schools and laughing at various things. In the college canteen we made friends with Munish. An easy conversation flowed between all of us.

Deciding to leave, we took a bus from college to the metro station. For some weird reason everybody was having a problem remembering everybody else's name. I could easily tell them their's in an instant, I don't have problems remembering them. Throughout the metro ride we were talking and gathered information about each other, mentally making notes. At Rajiv Chowk we all got down and decided to have lunch at Nirula's and that was our first outing together on our very first day.

Dramatics society auditions:  At around 1:30pm we went to the SBI lawns for the auditions. I was to participate in the production team audition and not acting, so i waited for Surabhi and Munish to get over with theirs, thinking it would be over in maximum two hours. Who knew it would take four and a half hours and I would wait for that long?

 

Movie Marathon

A day full of movies. 7 back to back and all pretty interesting. A vow to watch 10 shall be be fulfilled tonight.

List of movies seen and to be seen:

1) The Importance of Being Ernest 

2) Reality Bites

3) Mamma Mia

4) Harry Potter and The Deathly Hallows (Part1)

5) Identity

6) Carriers

7) Anaconda 3: The offspring

8) He's Just Not That Into You

9) The Butterfly Effect

10) Australia

Out of all these I was most touched and in a left-to-wonder state by Identity and Reality Bites.

Identity: Malcolm Rivers is a psychotic killer awaiting execution for several vicious murders that took place at a motel. His psychiatrist, Doctor Mallick, has discovered a journal belonging to Rivers that may explain why he really committed the murders. With this late evidence brought forth, a new hearing takes place on a stormy night in which Mallick will try to persuade the Judge to spare Rivers. Meanwhile, a group of ten strangers find themselves stranded in the middle of the storm in a remote motel in the Nevada desert, run by the manager Larry Washington. The ten strangers and a limo driver, Ed Dakota; an '80s TV star, Caroline Suzanne; a cop, Officer Rhodes, who is transporting a killer, Robert Maine; a prostitute, Paris Nevada; a pair of newlyweds, Lou and Ginny Isiana; and a family in crisis, George, Alice and Timmy York. With the phone lines down due to the storm, the group prepare to spend the night, taking care of those that have been injured through their arrival. However, the group quickly finds that there is an unknown murderer present, killing off each of the guests and leaving behind one of the motel's room keys to be found, starting with Room 10's key and counting down.

Caroline Suzanne is the first to be killed, and Ed finds her head in a dryer. Ed thinks that the convict killed her and when he, Rhodes, and Larry check the convict, they discover he has escaped.

All the other people become increasingly worried, and Ginny runs to her room despite been told to stay put. Her husband Lou chases after her but is also mysteriously murdered. Meanwhile, Ed and Rhodes find the con, knock him out, tie him to a pole and put Larry on duty guarding him. Everyone calms down when they realize that the con is caught, but he is later found dead with Larry's baseball bat in his throat. Rhodes is furious, and Ed finds Suzanne's wallet in Larry's box. Larry then panics and holds Paris at knife-point, but she escapes and discovers a dead body in Larry's freezer. With everyone distracted by the frozen corpse, Larry attempts to escape in his truck, claiming he did not kill anybody. He then accidentally runs over George, killing him instantly while George saved his stepson, Timothy, from being run over.

The survivors tie up Larry who tells them his story but does not get much sympathy from Rhodes, but the others believe him when he says he did not kill anyone. Meanwhile Timothy's mother dies, presumably from her injuries (Ed accidentally ran her over). Ed then tells Paris, Timmy, and Ginny to leave the motel, against Rhodes' wishes. Ginny and Timmy both die when their car blows up but their bodies are nowhere to be seen. The remaining four discover that all the bodies have now disappeared and that all ten share the same birthday. Paris also discovers that Rhodes is a convict as well and that he stabbed the officer to death and took his place. Rhodes sees her look through his car and attempts to kill her, but she is saved by Larry, who in turn is shot dead by Rhodes.

At the hearing, the contents of Malcolm's journal are revealed, indicating the prisoner suffers from an extreme case of dissociative identity disorder, harboring ten distinct personalities. Mallick is able to bring forth one of Malcolm's personalities, Ed, revealing that events at the motel are occurring inside Malcolm's mind, each personality being a distinct person though all sharing the same birth date. After hearing of events in the motel, Mallick informs the Ed personality that he must find and eliminate the hostile personality in order to prevent Malcolm from being executed lest all the personalities be killed off. In the motel setting, as the group is dwindled down, Ed believes that the personality of Rhodes is the murderer, and sacrifices himself to kill Rhodes, leaving only Paris alive. When Mallick demonstrates that that homicidal personality is dead, the Judge decides to place Malcolm in a mental institution under Mallick's care.

As Malcolm is driven along with Mallick to the institution, in Malcolm's mind, Paris has driven away from the motel to her hometown in Florida, Frostproof. As she tends an orange grove, she discovers the Room 1 motel key in the ground, and turns around to find the young Timmy standing behind her. Timmy, the true homicidal personality, had orchestrated all the deaths at the motel, and made it appear that he had been killed as well; he finishes his task by killing Paris, reciting Hughes Mearns's "Antigonish". Now driven only by Timmy, Malcolm strangles Mallick, and the transport truck runs off the side of the road.

(Wikipedia)

Reality Bites: Well, simply because it has people who have graduated from college and are trying to make their lives ahead. I can relate to it as I will be seeing myself in the same situation a few years down the line.

The joy of having my article published in a magazine! :D

Random Observations

I have nothing better to do. I speak a lot, but when I'm jobless i like to observ people arounf me. The following is what I've observed in groups of friends around me. They might not be entirely true also.

There are three categories of friends in a group. First, the overbearing, stubborn, leader kind of friends. These are the people who have the most imposing presence in the whole group. They will talk loudly, look at everybody as if addressing each one of them and then finally put forth a plan as to how to do something. They also have this irritating habbit of doing whatever they like. They suggest those thing that they want to do and then make everybody do that. If some braveheart dares to stand say something different, he/she is subdued with the secret weapons- sulking and getting offended. Hence the people have no option but to go do what these people want.
Second, the meek, following-the-leader kinds. They do exactly what the first category people want them to do.They asert no opinion of theirs and just accept what others are saying. They even change their own view according to the general view around them. They are generally taken for granted and when they express their desire to do something, they are sadly told to shut up and nobody listens to them. Oh, they also have this irritating habit of just putting their nose into everything. When they want to do something, they just start repeating it like a chant or something. I think it is a result of their complex or something. they dont generally get to be the leaders and when they get the chance, they just want to do everything according to them, at that very moment! Sadly, the people i have seen this category with dont listen and simply ignore them. :|
Third, the sane, practical kinds. These people listen to everyone and do what they think is right. They generally allow the first category to do what they want and are considered to be the main components of the group. But sometimes they are forced to do what others want to do. They are the kinds who dont like to intentionally hurt people and try to maintain a calm profile. And this at times leads to their own wishes being thwarted by others. But all in all, they are friendly with everyone and get along well.

But another thing i've noticed is that though the people are different in character and nature, there is a very strong bond of friendship among them. They stay together as a group and stand with each other, often ready to break a few jaws and noses for their friends. No matter what they are as individuals, you cant help loving them together! :D